I have fallen prey to the late summer malady of letting the kids watch way too much television. And since the digital revolution, the kids have wandered far from their PBS Kids home. Enter: Qubo. Exit: my sanity.
Blame the digital revolution; we now get more than 3 channels.
Ironic, isn't it? I thought I was investing in my mental health by keeping the kids occupied so I could actually start and complete a project. Now I have a host of new theme songs and crappy tidbits of animation in my head.
But wait, there's more!
Qubo doesn't do your usual commercial breaks. It rotates mini-infomercials every 25 minutes or so. I didn't pay much attention to it, at first.
One day, we're driving somewhere (en route to a thoroughly enriching and developmentally-appropriate children's activity, I'm sure...) and Lily pipes up with the following:
"Mom, do you worry you can't make the mortgage payment???" WTF; she's 7.
That was the beginning. Now I have kids that insist they'd eat more veggies if we just had a Veggie-Bot set that lets you make all these sculptures out of carrots and such. And the
Brownie Magic pan? Apparently a must-have for the grammar school set. What was most disturbing is when they both tried earnestly to make their case why a wall-mounted tooth paste dispenser would help them with their early dental habits... and they'd need two, of course, because L has a preference for cinnamon paste whereas X's palate is more discriminating, calling out for unspecified-fruit-flavor provided it has a SpongeBob on the packaging somewhere.
So, by eschewing commercial tv for their tender years, I have created fertile fields for infomercials. Which they actually watch. And quote, verbatim. For the novelty? Or the simple pleasure of pushing me over the edge?
(Admit it, you're still wondering who actually uses the verb eschew...)
My kids have yet to understand when I say we don't have the money for something, that we can't actually go to the bank and make money appear. But they know how to turn any leftover gold and silver jewelry into cold hard cash.
Sigh.
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Of course, I sympathize, but be thankful that it is not this:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBFeULHMO00
Sincere apologizes for adding to the cacophony of media sales pitches.
Soren does the same thing after watching those Qubo infomercials. They are always for adult products or services so you would think the children would pay no attention. But alas the Qubo folks are mad marketing geniuses having caught on to the fact the children are sponges and don't change the channel when a commercial comes on. We have firmly retreated back to our safe PBS world.
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