I resisted the siren song of the garage sale epidemic this weekend. Seriously? Entire blocks! I like the cooperative nature of the multi-family & neighborhood sales. And of course, it encourages recycling. But not reducing... it takes more willpower than I currently have to walk away from bargains and neat finds, even when it doesn't pass the "necessary" test. I still, however, am haunted by the finds that I walked away from. Even if they weren't for me, I usually had a pretty good idea of the perfect home for that .... whatever. Too many items to list here.
Buyer's remorse? More like restraint remorse... But once I've had something around long enough, it doesn't matter where it came from, eventually I get so tired of looking at it/dusting it/giving it space - I want it gone.
Remember all those Bible passages that talk about the necessity of casting off all those possessions and being free to pursue all things spiritual? On my good days I really get it.
Imagine the disastrous event that takes your whole house but you have a moment to grab one item... Of course the people and pets are safe, but what would you absolutely have to keep? I think I'd need the photo albums - although I have the memories and more importantly the experiences. Everything else is just stuff.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Friday, August 28, 2009
Back to School Uniformality...
I used to love back to school shopping, even when I was no longer in school myself. I still really love picking out cool notebooks, etc. and I'm quite particular about pens - even now when most of my writing is done at the keyboard.
This year hasn't been quite so much fun.
I have been able to squirrel away scissors, pencils, backpacks, lunch boxes from the Salvation Army. Thanks to my fabulous friend Tracey, I even got X's supply of logo shirts for his school uniform. (The uniform store has them on backorder...) I was only able to scare up one pair of pants from many garage sales. And I'm just trusting the fates that L's skirts from last year fit, because I can't entertain another option at present...
But, alas, list in hand, I took the kids to Target. What was I thinking?
I soon discovered that I had waited way too long to score the 8 (count 'em, 8) sets of Crayola markers that are required. Not a single box left in the store, especially not at their traditional loss-leader price of a buck a box. And no, Rose Art aren't good enough for K or 2nd grade, thank you very much.
There were exactly 3 kinds of folders left. All inexplicably festooned with pink flowers AND skulls. Is this the new gender neutral? Huh.
X got the last pair of uniform shorts. Hope they fit, because I forgot to pick up a belt for him.
Then again, my kids don't start school until the 8th. That means one more additional week, to hit the State Fair, the last days at the waterparks, the amusement parks.
Perhaps Target will restock before school starts. And me? I'm planning on recharging shortly thereafter.
This year hasn't been quite so much fun.
I have been able to squirrel away scissors, pencils, backpacks, lunch boxes from the Salvation Army. Thanks to my fabulous friend Tracey, I even got X's supply of logo shirts for his school uniform. (The uniform store has them on backorder...) I was only able to scare up one pair of pants from many garage sales. And I'm just trusting the fates that L's skirts from last year fit, because I can't entertain another option at present...
But, alas, list in hand, I took the kids to Target. What was I thinking?
I soon discovered that I had waited way too long to score the 8 (count 'em, 8) sets of Crayola markers that are required. Not a single box left in the store, especially not at their traditional loss-leader price of a buck a box. And no, Rose Art aren't good enough for K or 2nd grade, thank you very much.
There were exactly 3 kinds of folders left. All inexplicably festooned with pink flowers AND skulls. Is this the new gender neutral? Huh.
X got the last pair of uniform shorts. Hope they fit, because I forgot to pick up a belt for him.
Then again, my kids don't start school until the 8th. That means one more additional week, to hit the State Fair, the last days at the waterparks, the amusement parks.
Perhaps Target will restock before school starts. And me? I'm planning on recharging shortly thereafter.
Monday, August 24, 2009
Guest column from Molly Ellen
One of the best things about this blog - or the whole endeavor of limiting myself to purchasing only used items - has been the conversations it has started. In very disparate settings, really amazing, thoughtful discussions have emerged. And my high school friend Molly Ellen is just such an example. She is very supportive of stay at home parents and all the efforts we make to live well and perhaps smaller. I was lucky to get a short visit in with her and her family during my last Buffalo tour. It's so nice, having a mental image of hearth & home, that gives more dimension to mere Facebook updates.
So here's what Molly Ellen wrote in a recent note, posted here with her permission:
"Took the kids and the husband on a trip to Vidler's on a recent rainy Sunday. If you've never been to this WNY 5 & 10 Emporium, it's worth a stop on your next tour.
Since Vidler's contains literally thousands, in not millions of items, many of which are toys, I thought it might be a good idea to give the kids a lesson in finance while we were there. Instead of the usual begging on their part, weighing options on my part and crying on everyone's part, I decided to give them each $5.00 and let them choose something for themselves. It could be anything, as long as it was not dangerous and came in at $5.00 or less, including tax.
Here's what I learned:
-when it's 'their' money, my kids are much more careful decision makers than when it is 'my' money
-Connor is much more skilled at math than he lets on - I saw lots 'o calculations to add prices and allow for tax
-Erin is already angry about paying taxes. I see activism in her future
Both kids were immediately enamored with a display that allowed you to choose your own beads for bracelets, etc. one at a time. They declared that this was much better than the craft store where you can buy a bag of letters and still not have as many Ns as they really need. They were sucked in and each bought about $1.50 worth of beads. This, of course, impacted the remainder of their shopping. Connor was witnessed hand slapping forehead saying "why oh why did I buy those beads" in front of a display of small metal airplanes that were out of his budget by about $.50. Erin's quote of the day was, "Mom, it's just too much to look at in here."
Here's what I'm taking away in terms of consumption...My kids (and I) need to remember that it is easy to accumulate stuff, but the stuff can be disappointing and burdensome in the long run. Like any other rush, the thrill of shopping and buying is often short-lived. Also, as much as Vidler's is marketing their store as being a thing of the past, I think they're on to something with selling the smallest possible portion instead of the largest. The alphabet beads really got me thinking. Each bead was five cents. Sure I might be able to buy 1000 beads at the craft store for five dollars (making each bead a half a cent), but with my name, I still may not have what I need - 26 letters in my name 17 are Ls, Ns, or Es. Plus, I'm sure I'd get a lot of what I didn't need. Paying slightly more to be guaranteed what I need with nothing left to spare is a bargain in my mind."
Molly Ellen brings up some excellent points to ponder. I think I'll try the experiment with a bit of birthday money (this year we've been trying to use it on purchasing experiences rather than things) but giving them the option to choose.
I'm also thinking it may be time to institute an allowance, as a way to encourage them to learn to budget, and perhaps a way to encourage them to take ownership of various helpful projects around the house. My personal hot button issue: asking for help cleaning up toys and getting major attitude about (sigh) "you make me do EVERYTHING around here!"
This is when I have to struggle to keep control. Including not letting the Snakes of Rage spring from my forehead, with my hounds-o-hell voice saying all sorts of ridiculous things attempting to set the record straight. As my friend's sainted mother points out, "There's nothing personal about housework. It just IS."
Zen and the Art of Housekeeping. Coming soon, to a blog post near you.
So here's what Molly Ellen wrote in a recent note, posted here with her permission:
"Took the kids and the husband on a trip to Vidler's on a recent rainy Sunday. If you've never been to this WNY 5 & 10 Emporium, it's worth a stop on your next tour.
Since Vidler's contains literally thousands, in not millions of items, many of which are toys, I thought it might be a good idea to give the kids a lesson in finance while we were there. Instead of the usual begging on their part, weighing options on my part and crying on everyone's part, I decided to give them each $5.00 and let them choose something for themselves. It could be anything, as long as it was not dangerous and came in at $5.00 or less, including tax.
Here's what I learned:
-when it's 'their' money, my kids are much more careful decision makers than when it is 'my' money
-Connor is much more skilled at math than he lets on - I saw lots 'o calculations to add prices and allow for tax
-Erin is already angry about paying taxes. I see activism in her future
Both kids were immediately enamored with a display that allowed you to choose your own beads for bracelets, etc. one at a time. They declared that this was much better than the craft store where you can buy a bag of letters and still not have as many Ns as they really need. They were sucked in and each bought about $1.50 worth of beads. This, of course, impacted the remainder of their shopping. Connor was witnessed hand slapping forehead saying "why oh why did I buy those beads" in front of a display of small metal airplanes that were out of his budget by about $.50. Erin's quote of the day was, "Mom, it's just too much to look at in here."
Here's what I'm taking away in terms of consumption...My kids (and I) need to remember that it is easy to accumulate stuff, but the stuff can be disappointing and burdensome in the long run. Like any other rush, the thrill of shopping and buying is often short-lived. Also, as much as Vidler's is marketing their store as being a thing of the past, I think they're on to something with selling the smallest possible portion instead of the largest. The alphabet beads really got me thinking. Each bead was five cents. Sure I might be able to buy 1000 beads at the craft store for five dollars (making each bead a half a cent), but with my name, I still may not have what I need - 26 letters in my name 17 are Ls, Ns, or Es. Plus, I'm sure I'd get a lot of what I didn't need. Paying slightly more to be guaranteed what I need with nothing left to spare is a bargain in my mind."
Molly Ellen brings up some excellent points to ponder. I think I'll try the experiment with a bit of birthday money (this year we've been trying to use it on purchasing experiences rather than things) but giving them the option to choose.
I'm also thinking it may be time to institute an allowance, as a way to encourage them to learn to budget, and perhaps a way to encourage them to take ownership of various helpful projects around the house. My personal hot button issue: asking for help cleaning up toys and getting major attitude about (sigh) "you make me do EVERYTHING around here!"
This is when I have to struggle to keep control. Including not letting the Snakes of Rage spring from my forehead, with my hounds-o-hell voice saying all sorts of ridiculous things attempting to set the record straight. As my friend's sainted mother points out, "There's nothing personal about housework. It just IS."
Zen and the Art of Housekeeping. Coming soon, to a blog post near you.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Dog Days o' Summer
I'm continually grateful for the resources of a major metro area. Really, what are the chances I could complete this project in an area without a thriving second-hand business? And there is only so much that can be accomplished on Craig's List and EBay. As much as I hate Walmart and haven't shopped there in over a decade, what would I do if I lived out in the sticks and that was the only store around? (The answer: it's a moot point. I would go stark raving nuts long before we ran out of sundries...)
Today's free, low environmental impact, non-consumption activity? I biked over to my friend Pam's, and we took her dog Boo (terrier-something) to the Dog Park. I've heard of these places, occasionally aware of the public debate, have friends that frequent them daily and develop their social lives around them - but had never actually set foot in one. Quite the education.
I love dogs. I do. I happen to be allergic but I'm still a fan of the canine, in all it's crazy shapes, colors, and personalities. So it was like people watching, but for a cuter, furry crowd.
I know people that call their dogs their "children" and that's fine with me. I'm more offended if you refer to my children as dogs, although the Xman does, in fact, fetch quite nicely.
More than anything else, the dog park is like a giant playdate and a singles' bar, rolled into one. This particular park goes down to the Mississippi so there were legions of retrievers um... retrieving, very impressive dog paddles, and the distinct aroma of wet dog. It was controlled chaos - most guests and their people were exceptionally well-behaved. The usual protocol of wagging tails and sniffing butts prevailed. There were even a few spirited games of tag. Considering how many people/pet combos there were, it was amazing how ... civilized...it all was.
So it seems there is this parallel society, which I was fortunate enough to visit today. Very sociable, for humans and dogs alike. Endlessly entertaining, and refreshing. Especially later when we retired to a shady porch with a good local brew.
These dog days of summer aren't so bad after all.
Today's free, low environmental impact, non-consumption activity? I biked over to my friend Pam's, and we took her dog Boo (terrier-something) to the Dog Park. I've heard of these places, occasionally aware of the public debate, have friends that frequent them daily and develop their social lives around them - but had never actually set foot in one. Quite the education.
I love dogs. I do. I happen to be allergic but I'm still a fan of the canine, in all it's crazy shapes, colors, and personalities. So it was like people watching, but for a cuter, furry crowd.
I know people that call their dogs their "children" and that's fine with me. I'm more offended if you refer to my children as dogs, although the Xman does, in fact, fetch quite nicely.
More than anything else, the dog park is like a giant playdate and a singles' bar, rolled into one. This particular park goes down to the Mississippi so there were legions of retrievers um... retrieving, very impressive dog paddles, and the distinct aroma of wet dog. It was controlled chaos - most guests and their people were exceptionally well-behaved. The usual protocol of wagging tails and sniffing butts prevailed. There were even a few spirited games of tag. Considering how many people/pet combos there were, it was amazing how ... civilized...it all was.
So it seems there is this parallel society, which I was fortunate enough to visit today. Very sociable, for humans and dogs alike. Endlessly entertaining, and refreshing. Especially later when we retired to a shady porch with a good local brew.
These dog days of summer aren't so bad after all.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Staycation
Mom and Uncle Dad are visiting us from NY, so we've been bopping around doing all sorts of outings. Saturday at the Minnesota History Center, today at the Minneapolis Institute of Arts, tomorrow the Minnesota Zoo. These are places we love to visit anyways, but having guests is added motivation.
I need to confess the hardest thing about these visits has been the damn gift shops, with their siren song. I caved yesterday and let the kids pick out little baggies of polished rocks. It was awfully easy to just say "sure!" and hand the nice lady a ten-spot. And when we went to lunch, the kids spent much of their time sorting and naming their rocks. This had the added bonus of allowing the grownups to have a conversation or two and eat our Mock Duck Vermicelli Salads in peace. (Mai Village, Frogtown, St. Paul is fabulous.)
Today the X man didn't last long at the MIA - even with my increasing inventive/desperate games of I-Spy, he was done in a hurry. In the last few years they added a great family room and stocked it with lots of toys so he was happily playing there for a good hour, leaving L and the grandparents a more leisurely approach to the art. They dropped off L, and hit the gift shop, for a full 30 minutes. It was fine - the kids happily occupied, me doing some quilting, Mom scoring a neat pair of crystal and gold earrings. But I remember feeling strangely vindicated...
Shopping is in my blood. Even when I'm studiously NOT shopping, I'm well aware of the possibilities. It's like when you are told to NOT think about a purple spotted elephant, and have to continually rethink it in order to not think about it...
Right now, though? I'm more in the mood to divest... of all sorts of things. I feel the need for a major purge of toys, clothes and tsotchkes. L did bust me with a bag of stuffed animals I was trying to sneak into the Goodwill pile. She promptly dressed me down for my efforts, and announced that those animals (which she hadn't seen in over two months) were, in fact, her FAVORITES. Sigh.
I am holding on until back to school - on multiple levels - and amuse myself with all the projects I'll take on - and the stuff I'll get rid of - without my trusty supervisors, aged 5 and 7. It's good to have a dream or two.
I need to confess the hardest thing about these visits has been the damn gift shops, with their siren song. I caved yesterday and let the kids pick out little baggies of polished rocks. It was awfully easy to just say "sure!" and hand the nice lady a ten-spot. And when we went to lunch, the kids spent much of their time sorting and naming their rocks. This had the added bonus of allowing the grownups to have a conversation or two and eat our Mock Duck Vermicelli Salads in peace. (Mai Village, Frogtown, St. Paul is fabulous.)
Today the X man didn't last long at the MIA - even with my increasing inventive/desperate games of I-Spy, he was done in a hurry. In the last few years they added a great family room and stocked it with lots of toys so he was happily playing there for a good hour, leaving L and the grandparents a more leisurely approach to the art. They dropped off L, and hit the gift shop, for a full 30 minutes. It was fine - the kids happily occupied, me doing some quilting, Mom scoring a neat pair of crystal and gold earrings. But I remember feeling strangely vindicated...
Shopping is in my blood. Even when I'm studiously NOT shopping, I'm well aware of the possibilities. It's like when you are told to NOT think about a purple spotted elephant, and have to continually rethink it in order to not think about it...
Right now, though? I'm more in the mood to divest... of all sorts of things. I feel the need for a major purge of toys, clothes and tsotchkes. L did bust me with a bag of stuffed animals I was trying to sneak into the Goodwill pile. She promptly dressed me down for my efforts, and announced that those animals (which she hadn't seen in over two months) were, in fact, her FAVORITES. Sigh.
I am holding on until back to school - on multiple levels - and amuse myself with all the projects I'll take on - and the stuff I'll get rid of - without my trusty supervisors, aged 5 and 7. It's good to have a dream or two.
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Back from the brink
It's been way too long, but it turns out I didn't have much computer access while on our road trip. Or, when I did have a monitor and a moment, I had little energy or inspiration.
This was year 5 of the summer odyssey in which I pack up the kids and drive East, staying with family and friends along the way. It can be a lot of fun - open to the experience of new places, warped schedules. And it can be utter hell. I have been known to take a "mommy time out" on the side of a country road in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan because I am exhausted and can't stand the whining, and the car stereo only goes so loud, ya know?
It was an abbreviated trip this year - 2 weeks, 2900 miles - because I had to get back for work. We managed to get in quite a few good visits nonetheless. Some highlights: reconnecting with old friends, sailing and swimming on the St. Lawrence River, time with my favorite cousins. Awesome museum experiences in Naperville, Illinois; North Tonawanda's Carousel Museum, and Science North in Sudbury, Ontario.
I know it sounds insane, but the longest day we did was 720 miles. We left the Twin Cities at 4am, breakfasted somewhere halfway thru Wisconsin. Then a picnic lunch and incredible time at the DuPage Children's Museum in Naperville, Illinois. It was busy, crazy day of exploring and we were all pretty exhausted after 3 hours. We piled back in the car, and finally stopped at 10:30 somewhere in Ohio. (Quite the storm and light show, when there was any visibility whatsoever. And what's with the menage-a-trucks? Aren't double trailers scary enough? Yeesh.) I was crispy-fried but the kids were wiggly from too much time sitting still.
The only near-emergency on the road trip this year was when the DVD player spluttered and died. Luckily I had the Chronicles of Narnia on CD, along with Beginning Italian which was surprisingly helpful in keeping me awake. L had her I-pod, X was happy talking to himself or his bear, and I listened to the same Brazilian CD about a (bra)zillion times.
The added bonus this year? A firmly set precedent that we don't buy crap or souvenirs at each and every stop. I must admit to a bit of temptation at the duty free (sweatshirts! purses! various maple-based foodstuffs!) but I think that was just the fatigue talking. Other than food, gas, 3 nites in a hotel, the only thing we purchased was gin and saltwater taffy.
So, instead of back home and broke - we're just back. A good time was had by all/most. And yes, I'd do it again in a heartbeat - only for a longer stint.
This was year 5 of the summer odyssey in which I pack up the kids and drive East, staying with family and friends along the way. It can be a lot of fun - open to the experience of new places, warped schedules. And it can be utter hell. I have been known to take a "mommy time out" on the side of a country road in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan because I am exhausted and can't stand the whining, and the car stereo only goes so loud, ya know?
It was an abbreviated trip this year - 2 weeks, 2900 miles - because I had to get back for work. We managed to get in quite a few good visits nonetheless. Some highlights: reconnecting with old friends, sailing and swimming on the St. Lawrence River, time with my favorite cousins. Awesome museum experiences in Naperville, Illinois; North Tonawanda's Carousel Museum, and Science North in Sudbury, Ontario.
I know it sounds insane, but the longest day we did was 720 miles. We left the Twin Cities at 4am, breakfasted somewhere halfway thru Wisconsin. Then a picnic lunch and incredible time at the DuPage Children's Museum in Naperville, Illinois. It was busy, crazy day of exploring and we were all pretty exhausted after 3 hours. We piled back in the car, and finally stopped at 10:30 somewhere in Ohio. (Quite the storm and light show, when there was any visibility whatsoever. And what's with the menage-a-trucks? Aren't double trailers scary enough? Yeesh.) I was crispy-fried but the kids were wiggly from too much time sitting still.
The only near-emergency on the road trip this year was when the DVD player spluttered and died. Luckily I had the Chronicles of Narnia on CD, along with Beginning Italian which was surprisingly helpful in keeping me awake. L had her I-pod, X was happy talking to himself or his bear, and I listened to the same Brazilian CD about a (bra)zillion times.
The added bonus this year? A firmly set precedent that we don't buy crap or souvenirs at each and every stop. I must admit to a bit of temptation at the duty free (sweatshirts! purses! various maple-based foodstuffs!) but I think that was just the fatigue talking. Other than food, gas, 3 nites in a hotel, the only thing we purchased was gin and saltwater taffy.
So, instead of back home and broke - we're just back. A good time was had by all/most. And yes, I'd do it again in a heartbeat - only for a longer stint.
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