Off the Wagon

When I had first discussed the voluntary simplicity rules with my friend Tracey, we decided that the Salvation Army, mainly a place of used goods, was exempt. In the interests of full disclosure, the SA store in downtown Mpls is also where store samples go to die. Target, Macy's, Needless-Markups, etc. send their leftovers and also-rans. Sometimes you get an item that has a sticker on it, saying where it was made, how much it cost, and how much the eventual retail price would be. It's interesting to get a preview of what buyers are bringing to the stores, but more importantly you can find some good stuff at great prices. And the surprise factor is a lot of fun.

So, SA is almost as addictive as the old Bank's store in NE Mpls. which would have all the insurance liquidations (literally a fire sale) and a bizarre selection, usually at pretty good prices. Their best event, by far, was their "Garage Sale" each summer. Imagine a parking lot full of clothes racks, surrounded by some diehard shoppers wielding mismatched shopping carts, waiting for the opening. If you even leaned in or dared to touch an item, a large man with a bullhorn would mock you. Clothes at 90% off their marked prices, it was the closest I'd ever come to a game show shopping spree. Pure adrenaline. It was awesome, and deserves its' berth in the shopping Hall O' Fame.

I had a bit of a letdown this morning and was at lose ends, so my dear Toyota went on autopilot to SA. Initially, I was feeling pretty restrained as I perused at this week's offerings. Enjoying the "just looking" phase where you see what the possibilities are, but it's more of a flirtation. Am I the type of person who would artfully display this or that? Wouldn't this particular item finish the decor just perfectly? No, probably not. But for a moment, you have the possibility without the responsibility, and it is gratifying. It was touch-and-go (literally) in the linens aisle - lovely comforters and quilts for $20 - even throw pillows to match. Of course we don't need anything but this winter is all about burrowing for me. I think I get starved for colors, and I'm basically a fabric junkie.

I was doing well until the toys. Toys are my downfall, every time. Because they aren't for me. They have the potential of making roadtrips and other whiney times more livable. And my kids get invited to an awful lot of birthday parties, so I can justify stocking up. There was this I-spy game in a tube with tiny objects buried in brightly colored bits of plastic - even a beach theme! I have looked at these for several years, thought they were clever, etc. but couldn't bring myself to shell out the 20-odd bucks for one. Here it was - it even said prototype on it - for a measly $9. I folded like a cheap suit.

Once I took the first step off the wagon, gravity took over. I found myself back in linens with a set of 4 placemats in my hands ($3). I was able to resist the clothes, although we could always use kids pajamas. And then, sigh, back to toys: A lovely toy horse for my friend's kids. A rocket that whistled. A teddy bear that looks passably similar to my daughter's beloved BearBear, so perhaps she can transition before the poor thing falls apart. Total damage: $26.85. I even used cash. All of it.

The guilt was immediate - even though this was technically in-bounds. As with so much these days, the appearance of impropriety is enough to call in the ethics squad.

When I got to preschool to pick up my son, I told on myself immediately. Hours later, I still feel ... icky (or the Minnesotan equivalent, which is "ishy"). I knew I went shopping because I was a bit down, and now I feel worse. The trick is to have minor forays into RetailLand, but not to set up camp. Or to borrow my other favorite parallel, overindulging on a dessert doesn't mean you get to write the diet off as a failure and eat accordingly...

I may be a work in progress but at least I'll always have material!